Comedic Timing

"You look at the world and see how scary it can be sometimes and still try to deal with the fear. Comedy can deal with the fear and still not paralyze you or tell you that it's going away. You say, OK, you got certain choices here, you can laugh at them and then once you've laughed at them and you have expunged the demon, now you can deal with them. That's what I do when I do my act."

~Robin Williams, 1951-2014

 

Brilliant, compassionate, joyful, and deeply missed, when Robin Williams was describing his comedic talent he could have been writing the first paragraph in an adoption book.

 

Through facing the fear of a feverish child all night, waking (a term I use loosely since I did not really sleep) to discover hives in random places on my body, dealing with the internet being down while I am here with a sick, tired little girl, and oh, you may have noticed that we are in a foreign country trying to complete the adoption of a child who starting next week is going to need his new family to have their game faces on, face the future and take hold of it with confidence and optimism!

 

Sometimes all I can do is laugh.  But never think that I wasn't crying just a moment earlier.

 

I really love having a dry, witty sense of humor-and if you have gotten this far-you must appreciate it just a bit too!  I think looking at life in the face and laughing is a way to keep perspective, a way to avoid the paralysis of fear.  Fight or flight.  But, it occurred to me when I was reading Robin Williams' quote, and learning about his death through suicide, that comedy can mistakenly be used to mask pain.  Now, if you know me, you know I feel things deeply and even though I often put on a tough girl face, I really do see hurt, take it in, and hold onto it.  Hopefully in a good way that softens my heart and helps me cry out for justice.  But  if you are just skimming the blog and think that I am just skimming through this process, please know that nothing could be farther from the truth.

 

What we are doing is huge and has huge ramifications for everyone involved, consequences that  I may never even be able to imagine.  Good or bad?  It's hard to tell, because as little as I like to admit it, the world is not black and white.  Just like every choice in life, and even more so, adoption will bring positive and negative to everyone involved.  But so did getting married.  And so did having biological children.  And so does everything worth doing. Ever.

 

But if you look at the world and are overwhelmed with fear, then that fear will never change.  The powerless will remain voiceless.  The orphan will remain fatherless.  Poverty. Disease. Ignorance.  Face the fears. Deal with them.  How are we doing what we're doing?  We're not heroes, we're not saviors-but we've been saved. So now we are living it out, we're just doing it.

 

Thanks Nike :)

 

What are your fears, are you facing them?  Are you hiding or laughing?  Are you surrounded by dust and ashes?  It's okay, cry, grieve.  Then turn to what rises from ashes, life from death, light from darkness, take it, make it beautiful.  Beautiful things.

 

And laugh, because you know the ending.