Babushka Olga, Catch Up Part One

"A good woman is hard to find, she is worth far more than diamonds."

King Solomon

 

I have been told that I am a strong woman.  I tell you with all honesty, I am a mere shadow compared to the women in my life who stand as giants of strength, grace, compassion, and generosity.

 

Babushka Olga is such a woman.

 

When we first heard that Max had a grandmother who visited him regularly, we were optimistic and pessimistic.  To find any family connection or information in international adoption is rare. And any window into your child's past is priceless  However, many adoptive families face challenges from birth families-who don't want to take the child in themselves and maybe have never even visited him, but simply don't want him to be adopted because of the stigma.  And their word can keep that child in an orphanage until he ages out of the system.

 

So with excitement and trepidation we met Babushka Olga. And were instantly folded into her arms of kindness and humility.  Each Monday we visited with her as she greeted us with presents-dolls, stickers, hairbows and chocolates for the girls-and feasts of traditional Ukrainian food that she harvested and prepared for us herself.  As if that weren't enough, she gave us the treasure of learning about her and Max's family. How she was born of ten children in the middle of World War 2.  Of starvation and family death, of studying in Kyiv to be a librarian and of holding Max on the day he was born.

 

These days became sweetly joyful and heartbreakingly painful for me as I watched the closeness

One of our feasts!

between her and Max, as we all grew close to her, as I know that closeness would soon stretch across oceans.  We now have an incredible video library of her singing and playing with Max, telling their family history, and of all our Monday visits.  We knew over a week ago that it would be our last Monday with her and had hoped to ask her if after we picked Max we could come to her town and visit before we had to fly home. It was quite a shock when I realized that could not happen and with tears told Vitaly this could not be the last time we saw her.  I said we would go anywhere. She said she would go anywhere.

 

Giving Max his cross pendant.

So Babushka Olga came to Kyiv!  Saturday was an amazing day, full of blessings and memories.  Since he was two months old she has only been able to visit him an hour or so a week at the orphanage.  Saturday she could feed him, rock him, play with him, to his and hers heart's content.  We went to Perchaskaya Lava, the oldest monastery and one of the most famous churches in Ukraine.  A priest from this monastery came to the orphanage and baptized Max when he was younger, giving him a small cross pendant.  Olga asked if we had received that necklace when we picked him up at the orphanage.  We of course had not but were able to find an exact match and purchase it as a gift from his grandmother.  Afterwards we enjoyed a traditional Ukrainian meal, capped off by the traditional Ukrainian blow out diaper on your grandma in the middle of the restaurant.

 

Well, that's true love. :)

 

After we had exchanged gifts, looked at pictures, watched the girls perform Frozen, and other regular family activities, it was time to say goodbye.  This moment was really too much for all of us and we broke the tension quickly be realizing that we could visit again on the following Monday (this was Saturday.)

 

Cleaned the apartment and set out tea for Babushka Olga!

Babushka Olga took the train up again and we had another nice day.  A little quieter as we just did a

short excursion, to a lovely park by the History Museum and a walk through Landscape Alley, an amazing mosaic park for children of all ages. Another feast was prepared for us and this this time we received the additional treat of Babushka Olga's own recipes for her favorite Ukrainian foods!  And, she told us that as I would be busy with the children, Bard should do the cooking.

 

I like this woman.

 

I know I keep saying priceless, but to have his own grandmother's recipes is unbelievable.  Priceless. 

 

Goodbyes were still emotional and left all of us drained.  But I am holding onto hope that we can stay in touch through letters and Skype.  Yes.  Babushka Olga has Skype.

 

Max just kicked and babbled as she blessed each one of us in the traditional orthodox manner, begging us not to offend him.  But even though he doesn't know it yet, a little piece of his heart walked out the door with that beautiful woman.

 

Maxim Everett Bard Luippold, I promise you I will do everything I can to nourish that piece of your heart, to honor your birth family, maintaining ties across miles and across time.





Ukraine