Goodbye Charlie!

Well, last week Evelyn said goodbye to one of the "08 Babies" (see previous post). Good friends of ours, who we went through birthing class with, attended church with, and enjoyed summer BBQs with, moved to Indiana last week. Their little boy, Charlie, is just two weeks older than Evelyn, so it's been very fun to go through those early life stages together, especially since Charlie came to work with mom Ashley at our church office! The copier room served as the perfect nap area : ) I know Evelyn won't remember Charlie, but it's kind of sad for me because I loved the idea of them growing up together and as I'm a pretty relational person, I like to hold on! This is a good move for them-bringing them close to family, so I'm happy about that because my own family is so supportive and such a big part of Evelyn's life so I know how nice that will be for them. All through her life Evelyn will make new friends and lose some old, such change is just a part of being human. But today, in this moment, we are missing Charlie and wishing them a happy new home and lots of new memories to make in the days ahead.

Home Again!

Well, Bard arrived home safe and sound late Friday night-really late-1am! As many of you know, he was gone all week on a business trip to Ireland. It was my first time being alone so long with the baby. Overall it went pretty well. There were only a few times that I wanted to scream, cry, or run away. She was pretty good all week, only having one bad day, Monday. But in all fairness that day sucked for me and I think she mostly picked up on my emotions. Of course, a good week for a five month old still means that I had to feed her several times a day, change her, get her dressed, put her down for her naps, carry her around, and in general be there for her 24/7. But, having gone through this I can say how much I admire all my friends who do this on a regular basis, either becaue they are single moms or because their husbands travel a lot. And most of them have more kids than I do! It also really reminds me of how lucky I am to have a husband like Bard. He is so comfortable putting her to sleep, feeding her, soothing her when she is sad, and yes ladies, he even ASKS to change her diaper. What a man! I'm so blessed that Evelyn will grow up having a father who is truly engaged in her life. I love the relationship they have now and I can't wait to see how it evolves over the coming years.

Who Would Baby Vote For?

Ok, let me just say right off the bat that this blog might be a little controversial and it's definitely very long! But, you do know I'm feisty, so nothing should be a surprise! So, I haven't decided who I'm voting for yet. I know, I know, I can hear all my friends (both conservative and liberal) screaming "What?!" Well, calm down, and please don't give me your reasons why I should vote for the right or left, I know all the reasons, remember, I'm married to Bard-I can't remember the last time we DIDN'T talk about politics and after the election we'll probably just sit and stare at the wall : ) Anyway. There are things I like and things I don't like about each candidate and so far it's been a pretty unique and fascinating race. And that only increased exponentially with the introduction of Sarah Palin. Which brings me to my blog. . .

As you've probably heard, Sarah Palin had a baby in April. Guess what, so did I! So that right there interested me, but when I heard the baby had down syndrome and they had known about the diagnosis early on and decided to keep the baby, I really paid attention. As many of you know, we faced a scary time when one of my tests came back with what is called a positive marker for a very deadly disease. We had to decide if we wanted further testing, which could be inaccurate, or just to wait and see. The risk with getting the test was that there were many occurrences of the results being positive for down syndrome when the baby did not actually have down syndrome-a false positive. So, we might go through the rest of the pregnancy thinking the baby had down syndrome but not knowing for sure. We ended up deciding to get the test because I wanted to know for sure if the baby had the more deadly disease and felt like the uncertainty of down syndrome was better than the uncertainty of a more serious illness. Obviously the test came back negative and Evelyn is fine. But there was a time of unknown. And during that time I questioned myself. I had wanted a baby for so long. If the baby I finally had wasn't the one I had imagined, how would I respond? Would I be able to care for her? And most scary, could I love her in the same way? I was terrified that I wouldn't love her as much as she deserved. Then we had her and she was just so perfect and beautiful I couldn't believe it. But I remember very clearly, one day when she was about a few weeks old, looking at her as she lay on the changing table. I remember thinking, "She is perfect." I know then and there that it would not matter if she had a disability because she was my daughter and she was perfect. When I heard Sarah Palin say about her son, who is two weeks younger than Evelyn, that when she looked at him she only saw perfection, it resonated so strongly with me. Now, I don't think that makes her a good politician and while it helps me relate to her, that doesn't necessarily transfer into voting for her and McCain (oh I mean McCain and her, heh!) But I do think it makes her a good mom. Whether or not I vote for her will be based on her (and really more McCain's) stance on the issues-if I feel I can trust them to help the economy, help with health insurance, resolving crisis in the middle east, helping those around the world in need, and helping our country deal with povery and the education system. How I vote will have nothing to do with her family.

During the past few weeks I've been disgusted, but not shocked, with all the controversy that has been generated because a woman, a mother of five, a mother of a baby with special needs, a mother of a pregnant teenager is running for Vice President. Oh wait, let me rephrase that. Controversy over a woman running. Plain and simple, the rest does not matter. If she were a man the other labels would not even be part of the discussion. Was Bush ever asked if he could be a good father to his young daughters while being president? Was their young and influential age ever brought into the dialogue? What about Kerry's children? Gore's? Do they even have children? I don't know - because it wasn't an issue. Yet news reporters on top rated morning news shows seem to see fit to ask whether or not Sarah Palin can be a good mother while racing to the White House. They are asking if she considered how her children would be affected. Every mother I've ever met agonizes over every choice she makes regarding her children. Everything from the type of labor you want to have to where you send your kids to school, if you work, how much you work, your relationship with your spouse, where you live, what kind of car you drive, everything, big and little, is questioned for how it will affect your child. To ask if Sarah Palin can be a good mom while running for VP is to insinuate that she is not a good mom because what you are saying with that question is that she hasn't asked herself that. And she is really the only person who needs to ask that of herself. Her and her husband. And no, just because she is a public figure does not give us the right to ask-Barack Obama put it best when he said children were off limits. No one has the right to tell me to breast feed or use formula, to work or to stay at home, to put my children in public or private school, to spank or not to spank, what age I should allow dating, what my children should wear, or any number of other decisions that a parent must debate. And I certainly do not have the right to tell another mom what to do. And certainly not to judge her if she does something different than I do. We need to stop focusing so much on what other people shouldn't do and start focusing on what we ourselves should do. Care for others. Provide for those in need. Love the people around you. Be a good neighbor. I hope that all this controversy has died down and the media will focus on issues such as the war and the economy, health care and education-things we should really be talking about, not things that are none of our business. A former presidential candidate once said that it takes a village to raise a child. With the new vice presidential candidate we've certainly learned that it also takes a village to judge the mother on how to raise that child.

She Pulled Her Own Flutterfly!

She what? She pulled her own flutterfly! Okay, so, she has this toy that I got from a friend and it hangs on her carseat. And yes, on the package it is called a flutterfly, not a butterfly, no I do not make these things up! When you pull the little pink star the wings move and it makes a whirring sound. Bard and I have been pulling that little pink star for five months now. I had just kinda thought in the back of my head that she would be quite a bit older before she could pull it on her own, maybe not into college, but it does have a tension that makes it hard to pull : ) So yesterday when I was putting her in the car I hear this familiar "drrrrrrrrrrrrrr" I couldn't quite believe what had happened, but sure enough, she has proceeded to pull it on her own many times since then. I was astounded! She is brilliant. You may or may not be thinking that this event was blog worthy, but I assure you, it's probably the single most amazing act any child has ever done.

Don't read this if you're eating. . .

Well, the other day when I wrote I would let you know how solids affected her poop, I had no idea I would be writing so soon! By the way, if you think it's odd that I blog about my daughter's poop, you're right, it is, but I've been sharing it with you all for five months now and I don't want to let you down!

So this morning I was getting ready to go and Evy was still in her PJs (which by the way she looks adorable in!) I started to notice that her diaper was leaking, but I was almost done, so I waited a minute before changing her. I took off her PJs and there was poop everywhere! Seriously, it had come out of the back her diaper and it wasn't like it was just a thin layer, there was so much and it went most the way up her back! She, meanwhile, is in a great mood and just giggles away while I am trying to remember why I had a child and wiping poop off her arm. Who even knows how it got there? I think I should burn the pajamas. I couldn't even handle rinsing them off so I actually had Bard take them outside and hose them down! I should have had him do the same with Evelyn too : ) They're hanging on the deck right now-the pajamas not Evelyn. That was yesterday and this morning when I woke up I could swear I smelled poop and she wasn't even in the room. When I changed her she was just wet, but I'm not sure. . .I think it might be stalking me!

I think I'll take my diploma and hang it over the diaper pail. It will either be an encouraging reminder or the ultimate irony.

Cereal, Sick, and Some Ramblings

Well, it finally happened. . . Friday night we gave Evelyn her first solids-rice cereal. I had been planning on waiting until 6 months, but lately she has been wanting to drink up to 10 ounces and a bit more, which is a definite sign she is hungry for real food! She did really well (I'll put the video up later) and was very cute-trying to grab the spoon and pull it into her mouth. Of course since she doesn't know how to eat, half of what we gave her she spit out, but we just put it right back in, it's not like she cares! We're just feeding her once a day, in the evening, for now. We'll add twice a day pretty soon and then start introducing all sorts of fun things like bananas, sweat potatoes, and carrots. She'll be eating McDonalds Happy Meals before we know it! (Just kidding honey, of course we'll never let our daughter have fast food, what was I thinking?!)

Anyway, it was a pretty fun milestone, although one that will add some inconveniences into our life-such as more laundry, more time, and multi-colored poop. Don't worry, I'll be sure to give you updates on our little super pooper!

I plan on making most of her baby food by mashing up fruits and veggies and then freezing them until needed. So we'll see how that goes. I like the idea of knowing exactly what she is eating and not having to worry about any additives. And sheesh, is baby food expensive!

On a more depressing note I've been fighting a nasty cold all weekend and am worried that she might be getting sick too. I missed church yesterday, my grandparents 60th wedding anniversary party, and watching Lost with friends (oh yes, the best show ever, gotta love Saywer!) She seems a bit stuffy and has coughed some, but doesn't seem really sick yet-knock on wood. (Just a side note, while I've been typing Bard brought me a fruit smoothie, yes it's raspberry, yes I'm sitting in "The Chair" and no, none of it spilled! If you have no idea what I'm talking about, you better go read the posts regarding escrow, lazyboys and poop!)

Besides that, I'm going into a crazy work week-just a lot going on with fall around the corner-but even with that Bard and I are trying to spend a lot of time together because on Sunday he is abandoning me to go to Ireland! Okay, well, less abandoning, more going on a work trip, but still he will be gone Sunday through Friday and to put it plainly, that just sucks. What's really frustrating is that for a while we were planning on me coming too and of course bringing the baby. I was very excited about that since I've never been there, love Europe, and am mostly Irish (no Irish temper comments needed, thank you!) However, for a couple different reasons we decided at the last minute that it would be better if I stayed. I'm totally depressed, one cause he gets to go, two cause I'll be on my own, three cause she won't see him for a week, and four cause I haven't had a vacation longer than a weekend since our honeymoon. So, with a vacation promised to me next year, and the guarantee of a nice present from Ireland and lots of chats via Skype, off he goes. I know I'm very lucky and have lots of people to support me, but I'm still sad : ( So if you feel like babysitting me and Evelyn next week, give me a call!

Happy Five Month Birthday Evelyn!