Yes!

We shocked some people at our wedding :)  Maybe you've been to a wedding where the guests sang songs, but I am pretty sure you have not been to many where the groom got some serious air in his jumps-during the ceremony.

I'm trading my sorrows

I'm trading my shame

 

Yep, we know how to live it up in Tacompton and as we sang, us and our 7 bridesmaids, 7 groomsmen, 2 junior bridesmaids, 1 ring bearer, 2 flower girls, 2 flower girl attendants, and a partridge in a pear tree danced our hearts out on the stage, along with 300 guests singing and supporting us. Best. Wedding. Ever.

 

I'm laying them down for the joy

of the Lord.

 

Still hard to believe that we are just miles away from where it all began-a little village in rural Russia where I felt the call to adopt and the shared mission that brought Bard and I together.  Today as we drove to the orphanage, I was struck again by the similarity-painted green fences, brick houses, tree lined roadways, curved wrought iron.

 

Big sky.

 

I'm trading my sickness
I'm trading my pain

 

Yesterday we were confronted with a lot of sickness and pain.  Not ours.  But for our little Solnichko.  We knew some of his medical issues, but knowing the extent will take quite a while-months.  So yesterday we heard from our Dr-who had a lot of concerns. Now, don't get me wrong, we walked into this eyes wide open, setting out to adopt a child who would raise a lot of concerns.  But please forgive me if there was just a small part of me that wanted the Dr to get back to us and say, "Oh, well, he looks just about perfect in every way."  Because that's what I think he is.

 

Perfect.

 

We pored over emails, growth charts, websites.  There was no hot water for my shower.  We got lost on the way to church.  It was too hot.  And some dang Dr was telling me that this child has serious medical issues. But sometimes when you are fighting through hard moments, what you really need to do is just give in.  Sweet surrender.

 

Yes Lord, Yes Lord, Yes, Yes  Lord 

 

We decided to say yes. 

 

Yes to the unknown.

 

Yes to surrender.

 

Yes to our son.

 

 

We decided this before receiving medical confirmation.  We have some now, a few items make me feel better, a few make me feel worse.  But mostly I feel decisive.  I choose this child.  I will fight for him and I will not give up. He is worth it. He is precious. And he will always be loved by someone who will not let him go.

 

I am pressed but not crushed

Persecuted not abandoned

Struck down but not destroyed

I am blessed beyond the curse for

His promise will endure

And His joy is going to be my strength

 

 

Joy when I see how excited my two girls are to go visit their brother.  Joy when he smiled at me as I took him from the caregiver.  Joy as we can start to dream what it will be like to bring him home and know that it no longer seems like a dream we will wake up from.  But now part of the day. We still have a long road ahead of us-we now wait to see when our court date is and this will determine a lot of the journey.  We also want to try and gather more medical information and as best as possible prepare ourselves to give him the care he has so long deserved. And we are only one week in-health, safety, potential roadblocks could all be just around the corner.  But after a long night, I think morning is just around the corner too.

 

 

Though the sorrow may last though the night

His joy comes in the morning