Two Years, Two Stitches, and Two Weeks

If there was a CPS for Bloggers then I would go to jail :(

I would love to throw out lots of fabulous excuses like, "I have 3 children under the age of 7 and the only thing they ever agree on is to drive me crazy in as many ways as possible."

Okay, that is only one excuse but I am way too tired to think up any more, if we wait for me to get creative it will be another three months before I post a blog!

Do you see where I'm going with this?  Most nights my eyes feel jet lagged by 7pm and once the little (fallen) angels are quiet I simply want to stare at a screen, a book, or a wall.  And often I can't tell the difference between the three!

Anyway, moms are tired, call CNN.  (Maybe Donald Trump stopped being an idiot for 7 seconds so they are probably bored.) What about Max?! Today, for the very first time, instead of looking like a

First Birthday in the US!

bored CNN reporter when I walked in the door after being gone for several hours, Max looked at me, smiled, said "Hi!" and reached his arms out for me to hold him! Honestly, any one of those actions by itself would have made me just as proud as when his older sister-at the same age-correctly identified and pronounced "Trapezoid."

I know you are trying to remember which shape is a trapezoid.

But  Miracle Max strikes again by doing all 4 connection milestones in one fell swoop!  He had been sitting on his lonely little plateau for quite a while now. Not really taking any steps forward in speech, gross motor, fine motor, or even physical growth.  But apparently he decided that's for the birds and since turning two on June 6th, he has experienced a number of firsts.

*First steps (he had taken a few before but now will stand up and walk on his own, although still a bit of the drunken sailor going on.)

*First words. I had really begun to despair of him initiating communication.  Then I gave him juice. Now he asks for juice all day "Joo? Joo?" No Max, milk. "Joo? Joo?" Yeah. talking is great. He says "Hiiii" on his own too as well as a handful of other words, the rest is still pretty unintelligible although you can really tell he's trying more.  The best is tattoo (can you tell where we live?!) which he pronounces, "Gackoo." For all I know that could be the Ukrainian translation!

First bedroom!

*He's also grown more and is solidly in 18 month clothing.  Still behind where he should be, but for the first time he's on the growth chart!

*A little while after surgery we moved him into his own bedroom (this marked a first for me, first time sleeping through the night since summer of 2014.) Aside from being on his own, this was of course the first time he'd had his very own room.  That's kinda a big deal :)

*Eat. Ing. He has really made some great strides forward in this area, a fact I need to remind myself when he "forgets" how to take a bite out of a cracker.  He'll now eat most any food on his own, still doing best with bite size pieces but after months of work he will pick up food off his tray and eat it. Hard foods, soft foods, even, BUM, BUM, BUM, cold foods!  If we're Facebook friends then hopefully you've seen the video of him eating ice cream.  Let's just say it's a love hate relationship!

First boo boo :(

*And, yes, his first stitches. Okay, no, of course I have not forgotten the whole open heart surgery thing, but that was planned and I knew about it.  This was, crash, "MOM YOU HAVE TO COME NOW IT'S AN EMERGENCY!" Blood, crying, trip to the ER, stitches. After we were both suitably traumatized, and the Dr pulled a needle through my son's eyebrow, we went home.

So, good times.

But, the crazy beautiful unbelievable part of  this blog, and the reason I had to get it posted, missing creativity and all, is the milestones we will hit over the next two weeks. We already hit one milestone, the one year anniversary of when we met Max.  This whole summer is surreal because it's impossible not to compare it to last summer. Last summer we were in Kyiv. Last summer I ordered school supplies on Amazon-from Kyiv. Last summer I bought Bard's birthday present-in Kyiv. Last summer I wore this same shirt, in Kyiv (no really, I saw one of those Time Hop posts and I was wearing the exact same outfit as I was a year ago-in Kyiv.  It freaked me out so I went and changed. No, I'm not kidding.) But tomorrow marks the one year anniversary of our court date when we petitioned the judge to adopt Max (check out that blog post for way more bathroom information than you ever wanted to know!) Then, August 20th is our first Gotcha Day-where we brought Max out of the orphanage and into our family. Right after that of course is coming home. August 28th will mark one year home.

Everyone says to throw away the first year of adoption.  And although as I type this, there are certainly a lot of celebrations to remember, many of them exist alongside deep hurts and frustrations. I'm throwing out the memory of crying on my landing steps while I talked on the phone with our nurse in Seattle.  Max wouldn't eat and there was nothing I could do.  I'm throwing out the constant doctor's appointments that have disrupted our lives for months now.  In some ways Max is healthy and doing really well.  In other ways we have a future of unknowns waiting for us, just around the corner. I'm throwing out the utter and absolute exhaustion. The mental and physical drain of an internationally adopted child who has special needs. Special needs that remind you that you are weak. Special needs that you would think would make you compassionate and loving, but sometimes they just piss you off. Special needs that give you grace.

Grace

It's a name for a girl

It's also a thought that 

Changed the world

Grace makes beauty 

Out of ugly things

Grace finds beauty 

In everything

Grace finds goodness

In everything